Ask a Korean! News: Kyopo Project

There is a lovely photography exhibition in New York on Korean gyopo, i.e. Koreans who live outside of Korea. The exhibition is a series of portraits of numerous Korean Americans accompanied by a narrative. Here is an example that features Daniel Dae Kim. The Korean also loved the picture and narrative of Chang-Rae Lee, author of Native Speaker.


The exhibit's website is here: Kyopo Project. Visit the exhibition, or donate online to support this exhibit turned into a book form.

Got a question or comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Ask a Korean! Wiki: Teaching Positions in Korea

Dear readers,

Here is another chance to help out one another.

Dear Korean,

I'd like to travel to Korea and live there for a period of time. Most people recommend becoming an English teacher as the best way to secure a job and income. The Google results are overwhelming. Do you have any suggestions? I'm not sure how to start researching the possibilities nor have a good criteria base to judge programs. Advice on useful skills or concepts to know before arriving in Korea is also appreciated, but that could be a long list. (Skills in addition to learning Korean and for teaching, perfecting my English).

Jenn K.

Dear Korean,

I'm thinking about moving and have read some of your responses to questions asked. Is it very difficult to find work in Korea? I've noticed several teaching jobs, all seem easily attainable with a certificate, offered on line. I have about $200k cash and I have a 4 year old son, full custody. Just need a change.....

Patrick E.

The Korean thought about responding to these questions himself, but given the readership of this blog, anything the Korean might have written would have been inadequate compared to what the readers of AaK! would be able to provide collectively.

So readers, let it rip. In addition to providing links and resources, any personalized advice would be most helpful. Bonus points for third person-speak.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Everything is Super When You're Gay in Korea

Dear Korean,

Just want to say thank you for running this blog. I recently took an 18-year-old dongsaeng to meet a queer Korean friend of mine, and she asked a lot of questions similar to ones that frustrate you on Ask a Korean! When she asked, "do gay people hate straight people," I told her, "take anything you ask and replace 'gay' with 'Korean'. It's like asking, 'do Korean people want to be white?' Some Koreans hate white people while others want to be white people, and there's a whole range in between." It seems that we get similar questions all the time as Koreans (or Asians or blacks or queer or whatever) and it's great to see someone whose educated and thought about this on a deeper level to get people to think beyond lazy culturalism, and hopefully people get the deeper message about stereotypes and culture in general.

That all being said, I wanted to know your thoughts about the Margaret Cho anecdote about there being no gay people in Korea. Specifically, what are your thoughts as to the roots of this denial? Do you happen to know anything about the queer movement in Korea? It seems that homoeroticism has gained more acceptance in Korean media (i.e. the king and the clown, no regrets) but what about more mainstream Korean culture, as well as Korean American culture?

The Queerean


Dear Queerean,

Thank you for the kind words and the awesomest pen name submitted to the Korean so far.

This post will proceed in two parts: the Korean will first cover a little bit of historical background about this gay-denial, and Yeochin will follow by describing the current state of affairs of gay life in Korea.

First, the Korean would tip his hat to all the gay folks in the world. The Korean likes to talk about racial discrimination, but surely no discrimination can match homophobia as to its universality and vileness of its hatred.

Why the gay-denial? One must remember that a discussion about homosexuality requires a discussion about sexuality as a prerequisite. And there’s the first and foremost reason why any discussion about gays was completely buried until the last 10 years or so. Because Korea did not talk about sex, Korea does not talk about gays either.

There will be another time when the Korean will talk about Korean people’s attitudes towards sex, but suffice for the purpose of this discussion to say that it is extremely conservative. The word “Victorian” does not even capture it properly, because Korean taboo against discussing sex in polite company was stronger than any Victorian English standards. A quick example is the saying 남녀칠세부동석, which means: “Men and women, at the age of seven, should not sit together.” Yes, traditional Koreans were legitimately concerned about wild stuff going down at the age of seven. This uptight attitude about sex continued well into the very recent past. The very notion of sex education nearly caused a riot among Korean parents. Truly, the Korean remembers that as he was growing up, there were 16-year-olds who did not know what sex was. (This was early 90s.)

So there is the answer for the denial. Little by little, the news of the existence of homosexuality did trickle into Korean society. However, they were generally considered some type of disease that only foreigners carry, somewhat similar to (don’t laugh) divorce. The Korean himself did not even imagine the possibility of homosexuality until 1997, when he moved to the U.S. When the whole society pretends that sex does not exist, the more exotic type of sexuality is just as good as nonexistent.

It was not until about 10 years ago when honest public discussions about sex began to occur in Korea – and that was about totally legitimate sex between married people. But as everything in Korea goes, discussion about sex grew quickly, and since about 3 years ago, Koreans are finally beginning to talk about homosexuality, albeit still mostly tinged with ignorant curiosity of the grotesque (if you are lucky) or naked revulsion and bigotry (if you are unlucky.)

The two figures played a prominent role in finally exposing Koreans to the issues of LGBT: Harisu and Hong Seok-Cheon. Harisu is a model/singer/actress who showed Koreans for the first time in a meaningful way that yes, there is such as thing as a transgender. Following the universal truth that under our current system of vaginarchy, everything is forgiven if you are a pretty woman (see the application of this truth here) – even if you only recently turned into a woman! – Harisu by and large avoided a large-scale bigotry.

Although the circus-freak aspect of her gender partly propelled her celebrity, for the first time she was able to provide a genuine narrative about the issues that transgenders face in Korea through mass media. There is no doubt that she suffers private expressions of disgust; any corner of Internet gossip easily proves that point. Nonetheless, she has had a fairly successful career as a celebrity.

Hong Seok-Cheon is less lucky. He was once a young rising star, both as a capable actor and as a funny comedian. Yet when he came out in 2000 (and exposed the Korean public to the term “coming out” for the first time,) he became an instant pariah. He could not have been removed fast enough from his position as the host of a children’s show (similar to Sesame Street,) for fear that he might give children the gay.

He was undoubtedly in a more difficult situation than Harisu. With a transgender, the general public at least could justify it to themselves as some type of genetic disease. This is harder to do with out-and-out gayness. Hong was not a part of the vaginarchy, and his presence threatened traditional masculinity. His career was essentially left for dead for a few years.

Hong, however, courageously continued on, and as perceptions about homosexuality began to change recently in Korea, his career began to pick up as well. Hong appears to be aware that he is serving as the representative for all gay men in Korea in the eyes of the Korean public, and has lived his life accordingly. He kept his private life meticulously neat, and occasionally made headlines for his acts of charity, such as adopting his niece and nephew when their parents divorced.

So where is Korea now with respect to homosexuality? Certainly, there has been progress – if taking ten steps in Manhattan toward downtown counts as a progress towards eventually reaching Miami. As meager as it is, the Korean likes to see hope from the little things. But the remaining distance does appear vast, and any gains quite inadequate. Extreme ignorance, such as equating gays as pedophiles, reigns supreme. When Hong Seok-Cheon gave a special lecture on homosexuality in Seoul National University – the best university in Korea – he had to suffer through such ignorant question as “Do you want to be a woman?” Yeochin would provide further detail on this point.

What about Korean Americans? That entirely depends on the individual, because each individual Korean American has a different level of assimilation to the American society. But in general, since attitudes about sexuality tend to be the most deep-rooted and intractable cultural trait, the extremely conservative attitude usually survives. (Playboy’s Miss November notwithstanding.) Because homosexuality is more visible in the U.S., it is likely that an average Korean American may be at least more tolerant. However, whether more tolerance translates to more understanding and empathy for gays is doubtful.

[The following is written by Yeochin.]

Homosexuality has come a long way in Korea in the last few years. By this Yeochin means that some Koreans believe they do exist! In no way are they accepted members of society, but some are realizing that there are gay Koreans and it’s not just a myth. To give you a proper setting for the homo scene in Seoul, just picture a 1920s speak easy or cabaret. Everyone is loud inside drinking and wearing fishnets but outside its secretive, and underground. There is no Gay Pride here, only Gay Hide.

If you’re a lesbian:

There are several closed door clubs in the Hongdae neighborhood of Seoul. The girls have no features that distinguish them from a normal, heterosexual Korean girl. The behavior of girls holding hands and walking arm and arm is accepted in Korea as a straight thing to do, so when you see two lesbians doing it, you can’t tell. Yoechin’s lesbian friend -- let’s call her Canada -- is dating a Korean. This phantom Korean lesbian is 21 and lives with her parents. She has not come out to them. She has been in several gay relationships over the years without slipping up once to her parents. Canada wanted to come to her house once. Korean lesbian said “No, the day you come over to my house is the day I come out.” That day is scheduled for never.

There are also some gay clubs in Itaewon. Itaewon is known as a foreigner slum and right next to Hooker Hill is the fabulous Homo Hill. Both Hooker Hill and Homo Hill are English given names. Here Yeochin hangs out with her gay friends on the weekends and meets endlessly fascinating people with all sorts of sorted backgrounds.

One really tender girl -- Yeochin will call her Sweetie -- is in her first year of college at an all-girl school. She realized she was gay less than a year ago and has trouble dealing with it. Canada and her girlfriend took her under their wing to clubs and weekend trips trying to engage her. At the time she only knew of a couple lesbians and they were an hour away or more. She was very lonely. Then after several months of hanging out with us, she stumbled upon a girl she had never talked to before, but who she recognized from her University. She was so happy to find someone like herself. She wasn’t alone anymore. Finally, she had someone to talk to. A real friend.

If you are gay:

There really aren’t any gay clubs outside Homo Hill or Itaewon for men, although there is a notorious Gay Coffee Bean in Insa-dong. Korea doesn’t accept gays and this is a looming fear for those inside a gay club or coffee shop. There are attacks against gays that occur here. If you go to Homo Hill enough you will hear stories and maybe be unfortunate enough to see some shit go down.

Yeochin has not gone to Homo Hill enough to witness anything firsthand, but she has heard horrible stories of hate crimes. One of Yeochin’s friends had witnessed a girl getting her face smashed into a wall by a group of guys assuming she was a lesbian coming out of Homo Hill. My friend knew her and knew she was just there with a gay friend. These stories always make Yeochin nervous.

American Army fatigued guards march through Homo Hill every few hours looking for GIs out past their curfew. No one wants to get caught at Homo Hill at 3 in the morning. A lot of guys hide in jim jil bangs (saunas) or stay inside the club or bar for the remainder of the night. A gay club, called Pulse Two, recently opened outside the “hill” on the main strip of Itaewon, and it’s very popular.

Getting out of the “hill” is a huge step for gay acceptance and proves there are growing numbers of men coming to terms with their sexuality. Unfortunately there aren’t any gay clubs outside Seoul or Busan, which means that many of the men at Homo Hill travel an hour to two and a half hours to get there.

There is a Gay Pride parade in Seoul. Around this year’s Gay Pride Yeochin heard many complaints, mostly coming from foreigners who wanted a real Gay Pride celebration. The streets of Itaewon were filled with men and women wearing masks to hide their true identity and arm badges. The arm badges or chest signs said that no media could photograph, film or interview them. Korean gays are afraid of ruining their family life and losing their jobs if outted. Almost no foreigners participated complaining that this was more of a Shame festival then a Pride festival. Yeochin’s gay friend New York thought it was full on depressing compared to the Pride Parades in New York, Hollywood and San Francisco. Yeochin used to live in West Hollywood and Yeochin agrees.

There was a week long gay film festival at a club on the corner of Homo Hill, a small parade and then drinking at night wearing glow in the dark face paint and crazy costumes. A lot of gay Koreans went on and on about how far Korea has come in the past five years in accepting homosexuality. However, there is still plenty of room for improvement.

Some of the gay Koreans I have met have heartbreaking stories. This kid whose English name is Chris is only eighteen years old. He lives on the streets in Suwon. His family kicked him out of his house; he dropped out of school and was now jumping from one guy to the next for food and shelter.

Another guy Yeochin met was Korean American from Las Vegas. He hated it in Seoul and couldn’t wait to leave. He left for West Hollywood a few months later. Another guy was thirty and looking to open a bar in West Hollywood and get the heck out of Korea, but he is still working at his bar near the DMZ. He travels about two hours to get to Homo Hill so he can’t go there as often as he would like.

Yeochin’s favorite Korean gay man is Nine (as in the number) and he moved to Japan just a month ago. He says if he comes back to Korea it will be when his boyfriend is finally ready to grow up and accept himself. He will only come back when his boyfriend is ready to go to Canada and get married. His boyfriend is Korean Canadian and Nine is thirty two years old.

Yeochin believes the homophobic roots run deep in Korea. But change is taking place, albeit very slowly. One just needs to have hope and have heart.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Now, to cool off, the Korean presents the new Banpo Bridge at Seoul, newly renovated with dancing water fountains:



Fountains were installed as Seoul city's new project to upgrade the city's looks.

Source: Gizmodo.

There are 12.2 restaurants in Korea per 1000 people, compared to 1.8 in the U.S. and 5.7 in Japan. (Article in Korean.)

Ask a Korean! News: The State of Organized Racism in America

New York Times reports that hate groups so far have been mostly quiet during this election that features a black man running for president. But apart from the main message, this quote attracted the Korean's attention:

“There’s a real problem,” Mr. White said in the interview last month, “in what’s called the ‘white movement.’ One, there’s a lot of people who are just mentally ill, and we deal with those a lot. No. 2, there are people who have serious sexual problems.”

So according to Mr. White, a lot of organized racists are mentally ill or have sexual problems. It is great news -- organized racism has been marginalized in America to the extent that the ratio of mentally ill people within its ranks has become a real problem.

But on whose authority does Mr. White speak? Well, turns out Bill White is a very knowledgeable source in this area, given that he is only the head of American National Socialist Workers Party, i.e. the American Nazi party. Oh, and just to prove his street cred, he also is now in custody on the suspicion of trying to harm a juror in a hate crime trial.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

The Korean fully agrees with Roboseyo's review on My Sassy Girl. The Korean cannot believe why or how that movie possibly succeeded.

Spain, staying racist.

America, getting less racist.

The Schizophrenic Arts of Korea

Dear Korean,

As Korea has a hyper-competitive education system/society, are students actively discouraged from becoming musicians or artists (I mean real musicians. not the k-pop, look-good-but-can’t-sing-for-peanuts, populist kind,) and if so, what kind of person would pursue these activities in Korea?

Just Kinda Curious


Dear JKC,

Your instincts are on the right track. Traditionally, musicians or artists were not a venerated occupation in Korea at all. They formed the lowest of the social order, along with butchers and executioners.

However, it is important to note that this attitude does not indicate that traditional Korea was hostile to arts. It is quite the contrary. One of the essential qualities of the members of the yangban (= noblemen) class was the ability to write beautiful poetry and draw elegant black ink paintings, which were all part of higher learning along with broad knowledge of Chinese classics.

So it would be more appropriate to say that Koreans have a strong sense of “high” art and “low” art. For Koreans, anyone who wishes to be considered educated must have a general knowledge of the “high” arts. On the other hand, those who devote themselves full time to “low” arts are considered, well, low.

Such attitude persists to this day, except that the categories of “high” and “low” art have changed. “Low” art included new forms of pop culture, such as cartoons or pop music. Indeed, most Koreans did not consider pop musicians to be artists until around 15 years ago.

The interesting part is the new “high” arts in Korea. Guess what the most prominent form of new “high” art in Korea is? Fellow Koreans, what did all of you learn when you were children? That’s right – Classical music! Indeed, classical music has become the high art in Korea, as Chinese poetry and black ink painting went out of style. Since every Korean mother wishes her children to be educated, learning to play some classical music instrument has become an essential part of Korean childhood. The Korean himself had to learn piano, and violin is also quite common. Drawing and painting is also included the “high” art category, although to a lesser degree.

So let’s get to the answer of the last part of the question. Who are the people who pursue artistic activities in Korea? For “low” arts, mostly creative-minded people who did not do so well in school. This trend has been changing in a major way recently, but even as late as 10 years ago, it was a big deal for someone who attended Seoul National University (= best college in Korea) to become a pop singer. Slightly earlier in time, there were some Korean pop singers who initially gained notoriety as “SNU graduates who can sing.” (For example, Jeong Seok-Won of 015B.)

What about “high” arts? Answer: every Korean, until s/he quits. Some quit early, like the Korean himself who quit in less than a year after throwing massive tantrums. Many Koreans keep it up until they reach college, when they major in something other than music. And a considerable number simply continues on, flooding world’s top conservatories. (Bonus points for anyone who can identify the talented cellist in the picture.)

Aside 1: the Korean recently took a violist to Cal alumni bar in order to watch college football. Upon entering and seeing the sea of black hairs and brown eyes, she said: “Oh, it’s just like Juilliard.”

Aside 2: when Margaret Cho held a show at Carnegie Hall, her opening joke was: “I am certain that I am the first Korean to stand here on the stage of Carnegie Hall without a violin in my hand.”

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

-EDIT Oct. 22, 2008 8:28 a.m.- Proving the high-low point, Dong-A Ilbo highlighted an SNU grad who debuted as an actress. (Article in Korean.)

Fun New York Times article that confirmed almost everything the Korean wrote about why Korean Americans are poor tippers.

Good article on New York Times that proves two of the Korean's deeply held beliefs:

1. Despite its numerous flaws, Korean educational system does at least some things right. -- The Korean himself was a poor student at math and science in Korea, but once moved to U.S., he was destroying the curriculum. Californian 12th graders learn 8th grade Korean math. It's a crying shame.

2. Immigration is a vital source of strength of the U.S., and it must be encouraged -- So what if America sucks at math? Import more Asians!

Ask a Korean! Wiki: Korean Food

Dear readers,

Would anybody like to help out Stephan?


Dear Korean,

I moved to Seoul a few months ago to start a new job. Unfortunately due to a lack of an eating partner, I've been forced to eat out at Kimbap restaurant every other night. Although I've learned to read Hangeul, I have yet to fill out the vocabulary to put it to any good use. Do you have any tips on websites that list different types of Korean food accompanied by an English translation? I've found a few dishes by trial and error, but the more elaborate dishes are still a mystery.

Hungrily yours,

Stephan


The Korean knows the minders of various Korean food blogs frequent AaK!. The Korean could have simply replied in an email, but now is the chance for Korean food blogs to show off on this blog. Go nuts.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Koreans are trying to become more open to adoption.

Ask A Korean! News: More about Prostitution in Korea

[First post by Yeochin!]

Apparently, Korean sex trade accounts for 1.6% of its GDP.

Yeochin finds this one very amusing as she has read MANY articles about Korea's crackdown on prostitution and red light districts through out Korea. However, Yeochin lives on a five way intersection called Ganseokgogori and can see the red light district from her apartment. Most of the time when Yeochin tells a cab driver to take her to Ganseokgogori, that is where he will drop her off. She has walked down this street a few times and it is very obviously a sex trade street. The city council has to be blind, deaf and dumb to not notice it.

Yeochin also got lost on the bus and got off at the red light district of Nam-gu. Not to mention she accidentally checked into a motel in Itaewon in Seoul that turned out to be a whore house on Hooker Hill. If she wanted to turn off the bedroom light she had to pull a string over the center of the bed.

Which reminds Yeochin of a story that happened to a friend. The friend also mistakenly wandered upon Hooker Hill expecting to meet another friend at some bar there. When she opened the door a tall amazonian prostitute kicked her in the crotch knocking her to the ground and then slammed the door on her. The prostitute didn't want any competition coming into her bar! Yeochin's friend only remembers a giant leg coming through the door and having the wind knocked out of her. She can laugh about it now, so that's good.

Got a question or a comment from the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

The Strange Events of Notes and Bowling

[This post is written by Nuna.]

Dear Korean,

While studying in China, I was approached by a group of 6 of my young Korean classmates (age 20-22), asking if I wanted to go bowling with them. I said I would be happy to go. After we agreed on all of the details – day, time, place to meet – they left. Soon after, they came back to my desk, and each one put a paper note on my desk listing the details – time, place, day, bowling. I had 6 identical pieces of paper on my desk saying when we'd go bowling. So, I looked at them and said "Okay. See you downstairs, Monday at 5 p.m. to go bowling." They went back to their desks. A few minutes later, they came back to my desk and said "We don't want to go bowling with you." And they each took their paper note back and left.

What did I do wrong??

John


Dear John,

Nuna guesses that they must have been Korean girls -- she just cannot imagine Korean guys doing things with notes. After Nuna discussed this with Umma (who is quite possibly the most cynical bluestocking in existence), Nuna has come up with three possible scenarios:

1. Bullying

There are lots of reasons why you might be singled out for bullying. You may be considered to be too fat, you stare off into the distance a lot, your responses to the girls always miss the mark by 0.5 seconds, but most likely, the bullies just thought you'd be the easiest to pick on and get away with.

Here is another possible reason that may have applied to you: Nuna never found out why, but the average Korean believes that people who smile a lot is inferior in pragmatism/practicality/quick decision making/focus, and they are smiling because they are inherently stupid. This happens to be a barrier for most white people, since we are taught to smile when we meet the eyes of a stranger, and smile very often in our conversations to indicate our friendliness.

Another thing to note: do NOT smile too often to a Korean, or look at them too closely. The assumption, for some crazy zany reason, is that smiling or looking too often at a Korean signifies that you like them *that way*. Nuna made this mistake several times in which Nuna was smiling constantly out of discomfort in being forced into sitauation with grown male children of family friends, and then heard their mothers making fun of me for blatantly displaying my attraction towards them.

(Picture from here.)

Yet another thing aginst those poor white people is that Koreans feel that when a person with a coloured iris speaks to them, they are not really focusing on you, and looking somewhere over your shoulder. (Incidentally, Koreans favour dark eyes where the pupils are indistinguishable from the iris). When this assumption carries over, it is assumed that any nice thing you do is not out of your graciousness or character, but because you are too stupid/vacant/lights are on but no-one's home to take advantage of it.

What you experienced, if this was the case, was classic group cattiness. The entire point of the bullying was to illustrate in an obtuse manner just how much you didn't fit in the group, and how much the group feels that you are a deadweight that the group has let in out of charity. The six notes reminding you of a date, place and time you are now barred from going is a sort of "voting you off the island" thing. They're amused and flattered at your apparent attraction to them, which just proves how awesome they are, but no, they're clearly headed for Better Things.

Nuna would like to make a note here though: this happens across all races and cultures, and this is also perhaps why men in a bar are afraid of asking a woman out when she is surrounded by a group of other women who will all simultaneously rise to go to the toilet at random times. Nuna also experienced similiar things with groups of men when they were briefly in the company of a woman they considered too fat/ugly/loose. As far as Nuna can tell, Nuna has never been subjected to this kind of scrutiny because Nuna is almost as manly in her mannerisms as Margaret Thatcher, and she tends to strike fear into all women who wish to remain feminine.

2. There was a girl who liked you who was not in the group, and she backed out.

The premise is simple. Some chick likes you, but hasn't got the courage to ask you out one on one. Thankfully, one of the group members hear her pleas and decided to do a group thang, partly to see if you meet their approval to date her dear friend. Hence the overbearing thing where each group member has to absolutely make sure, for the sake of said friend.

And then the said friend backs out. Well, the reality of the matter is, they weren't interested in you that way for starters. You were a nice enough guy, but certainly don't belong chatting amongst a group of chicks, and whatever will you do if girl talk came up? Hence, there was nothing for it but to tell you it's off, and it was most likely off for them too. They never liked bowling anyway, what with the ugly borrowed shoes, carrying heavy weights and the slippery floor. They chose it because white people would probably enjoy that kind of stuff. (Koreans have lots of strange notions about what white people like.)

3. They found something/someone better.

The premise here is that they got a promotion offering a group discount if more than a certain number attended - who knows, maybe 10. In this case, you would not have been the only one that was asked, and because bowling would be out of their price range if anyone dropped out, the assumption is that you, the foreigner, would not understand/care about these things and be the most likely to flippantly change their mind. Hence the repeat confirmation.

At this point in time, you're probably saying "Hey, how the hell is bowling in China out of ANYONE'S price range?" Well, Nuna is going to tell you this: A lot of Koreans tend to arrange trips and whatnot "for the experience", and they already know to a certain degree they may not enjoy it. In this case, the larger the group, the more of the members are assuming and attempting to seek gratification from the vague idea that "SOMEONE must be enjoying this at least, and we should suffer for he/she is a member of our group".

Now, in this scenario, someone else either thought up of going to karaoke (they discovered Korean songs are recorded on Chinese karaoke machines too), which is infinitely better because you get to be drunk and nobody gets to see your smeared makeup in the dark room, or someone else who was invited wanted to bring a friend that was favoured over you, presumably because that person can speak Korean and things won't be as awkward. So you were considered inferior to that person because of connections ( you didn't have other friends who were in on this thing) and the fact that you were a "stranger" (they would feel they were forced to be on their best behaviour so as not to have you bitching about Those Crazy Gooks later on).

Curiously, in all their planning and counter-planning, they never considered the fact that flippantly deciding to kick you off the list is a pretty crass and rude thing to do. Either explaining the situation was beyond their capabilities, or they just didn't feel like explaining it to you.

Whatever the reason behind it, it ultimately boils down to the fact that the group of girls considered you to be not "in" their group and privy to the group's discussions and considerations, and probably didn't explain anything to you because they realised it would only make them sound catty and stupid. Just laugh off at their immaturity in getting themselves into a mess and handling the situation badly, whatever their reasons may have been. They're just kids whose parents paid to send them off to China, after all.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Ask a Korean! News: Interesting Statistics about Prostitution in Korea

This article was interesting:

According to a survey conducted with men who completed the John School program for being arrested for sex purchase in 2006, a typical John is in his 30s, college-graduate, working as an office worker earning $1,800~2,400 a month, and purchased sex at a massage parlor after drinking.

In the Ministry of Justice survey conducted on the 5th, among the 1289 men who responded to the survey, those in their 30s were most numerous, with 645 (50%). They were mostly college graduate (774, 60%) and high school graduate (363, 28.2%).

Among occupations, the most numerous was office workers, with 438 among 1272 who answered (34.4%). 324 of the 1290 (25.1%) who answered said they earn between $1810~2400 a month.

Average number of sex purchase was 15.8, slightly higher compared to the 2005 survey, which was 11.1 times. Most common answer was "2 or 3 times", with 290 out of 1221 (23.8%) who answered, but there were 34 (2.8%) who replied "over 100 times."

For a question that asked for multiple answers for the place of sex purchase, over half of the 1290 who answered (765, or 59.1%) selected massage parlor, 703 (54.5%) selected red light districts, and 577 (44.7%) selected entertainment bars. [The Korean's note: Korean word for the "entertainment bar" is 유흥주점, which is a legalistic term for what is better known as "room salon".] For a question that asked for three main reasons for sex purcahse, 798 out of 1293 (61.7%) selected "drinking".

Via Dong-A Ilbo.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Ask a Korean! News: Mr. Jeff Meyers, Winner of Hate The Korean Contest

The Korean's writing about expats reached a wider audience a few weeks ago, via Korea Herald. Whenever the wider audience is reached, however, the haterthon inevitably begins. After about two week's worth of hate mail, the Korean is proud to announce that Mr. Jeff Meyers, apparently from Australia, is the winner of the Hate The Korean contest!

Below is the winning piece:

From: Jeff Meyers ([email redacted]@yahoo.com.au)
To: askakorean@hotmail.com

Re: Your Korean Herald article

You are right when you say our "deeply held beliefs" do not apply to Korea . We believe people in all countries should not be rude , ignorant , smelly ,arrogant racists . In all countries around the world 95% of people are not .However , in Korea it is the opposite . 5% of people are wonderful and 95% are scum . Ask anyone , particularly in the service industry , outside Korea , who are the worst people to deal with ,and , most of the time,the answer is " no question , Koreans!"

Yes , our beliefs do not apply to this place , and , quite frankly us "lazy expats" couldn't give a fuck wot you say or wot you think , your opinions are irrelevant to us .

You just go back to living in your little dog box apartments , deluding yourselves how fantastic you all are and for the same price of one of your dog boxes , we will live like kings in our countries . HA!

There were indeed many worthy contestants, but no one could quite match Mr. Jeff Meyers' broadside allegations, made-up statistics, awkwardly interposing levels of swear words, and awful spelling and punctuations.

The Korean congratulates you Mr. Meyers. Now go shove it up your ass.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@hotmail.com.

Excellent article about how there can be racism without racist individuals.

Apparently, 44% Koreans who start in "good colleges" drop out. (Please note that the headline is incorrect: the Korean's alma mater is most certainly NOT in the Ivy League. It belongs to Pac-10, and plays far better football.)

The article does not say how the dropout rate breaks down among Korean students studying abroad since colleges, Korean students studying abroad since between middle school and high school, and Korean Americans - which would have been the most useful data, particularly because this data goes so much against the Korean's own experience.

At any rate, that's a lot of disappointed Korean mothers.

For what it's worth, Jose Calderon is really, really sorry about that whole eye thing.

Actress Choe Jinsil, 40, Found Dead at Her House in Apparent Suicide

Choi Jinsil, perhaps the most successful Korean actress ever, was found dead in her house in an apparent suicide. She apparently hung herself, and was discovered by her brother Choi Jinyoung, himself an actor.

I am in utter shock, and so is the entire Korea, evidenced by the fact that the news of her death is posted higher in all Korean online newspaper than such important news as the news of North Korean preparing to fire another missile, or the news of U.S. Senate passing the bailout plan.

Here is my tribute to Choi Jinsil, hastily written.

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Choi debuted in 1988 as a 20 year old fresh face, and was an instant hit. Every drama, every movie, and every commercial she appeared was turned into gold. By the mid 90s, she fetched $100,000 per each commercial she appeared -- an incredible sum, given that at that point the highest paid professional athletes in Korea would be paid around $100,000 a year. She was so popular that a female voice actress who could mimic her voice for the purpose of radio commercials earned more than any other voice actress in Korea.

But to truly appreciate her career, one needs to see the general arc of Korean actresses' careers. Pretty faces are dime a dozen in Korea. Some of them can even act. But as they get older and lose their natural beauty, they generally cannot reinvent their persona into a longer career. This is true in Hollywood, but the decline in Korea is significantly worse, especially when there are relatively few dramas or movies where women are anything more than pretty ornaments.

But not Choi Jinsil. She was like Madonna in a way -- she may have started her career as a pretty young thing, but she transformed into a serious artist through her career. And the true reason why she was a hit above and beyond anyone began to show: she had spontaneous energy which was channeled into a very sincere acting. Her characters were always hopeful, and never discouraged no matter what the circumstances. Choi's brand of unrelenting hope was never melodramatic or phony, as Korean dramas often are, because she projected positivity with such conviction and sincerity.

Yet the low points of her personal life were as low as the high points of her career were high. In 1994 her manager was murdered by her driver, and she took the witness stand in a highly publicized trial. She married a star baseball player in 2000, only to separate in 2002 and officially divorced in 2004 following episodes of domestic violence; she had to pay her husband in exchange for his relinquishing custody of their two children. Adding insult to injury, she was sued for $3 million by the company that hired her as a spokeswoman, on the basis that her mismanagement of private life caused damage to the value of the company. Her career was left for dead.

Despite all this, she plugged on. Her acting now added a dimension of tenacity for life, which resonated with the unglamourous yet unrelenting spirit of Korean ajummas. Gradually, her star rose again. She became an inspiration for divorced women, who were not seen kindly in the Korean society although they were increasing in number. She dared to change her children last name into her own, drawing the ire of traditionalists.

She possessed beauty that is so rarely seen on television: the female beauty that does not rely on youth or make up. The type of beauty we would find in our mothers and grandmothers, perhaps. The inner glow of hope that survived all the years of hardship.

And that is why I am particularly saddened. I had really wished to see this woman happy, finally living her life trouble-free. I wanted to continue playing the roles of Korean everywoman well into her golden ages, perhaps as Julie Andrews does for Americans now. In the current media culture that glorifies early death, the beauty of fine aging is underappreciated. But if any woman in Korea could show that the beauty of aging into her 60s, 70s and beyond, in my mind, it was going to be Choi Jinsil.

Instead, it appears that her actual will to live was quite apart from all the characters that she had played. To this, I can only express sorrow and regret.

p.s. I am aware of other issues associated with this tragedy, such as the recent string of celebrity suicides in Korea and the vicious gossips on the Internet that sometimes claim lives. But I will deal with them another time. Right now I'm just not in the mood to rationally analyze those things -- I don't even feel like writing in third person, lest what I wrote would not sound serious.

Good article on New York Times about New York's own history of tainted milk and the parallels with what is going with China now.

Although this is not the main point of the article, the Korean will highlight this portion:

In the end, New York milk was cleaned up. It took stronger food laws, better policing, the advent of pasteurization and the passage of the Food and Drug Act in 1906, 50 years after the worst of swill milk. Above all, it took decades, not months or years. China faces many more food scandals — to add to recent alarms like pesticide-laced dumplings and lard made from sewage — before it reaches the point where its citizens can routinely trust what they eat.

The Korean highlights this to show that social progress is achieved slowly, even when the problem is as dire as tainted milk killing babies, and everyone knows about the problem. Similarly, it will take some decades before China and Korea fix even the most prominent social problems that afflict them. (Like bad driving in Korea, for example.)